I shouldn’t need them, those silly sounds of acceptance.
I should know, should believe those blissfully sweet syllables.
But the bitch won’t release me.
Her jaws impale my awareness;
I’m defeated by her snarling sarcasm.
“Why you? You’re nothing. You’re unworthy of such sentiments.
What have you done to deserve them?”

I yearn to ask, to muzzle the mongrel and put her in her place,
And if I do?
Maybe you’ll answer. Maybe you’ll overlook the insanity that stalks me.
And maybe the monster will settle, for a few moments.

Or maybe you’ll realize how impossible I am,
How unworthy of anything more than your pity.
Maybe, in asking, I will offset the balance
Between desire and disgust.

I grapple with the questions, wanting not to need so much.
Why can’t I accept these wonderful words?
Why can’t I kill the bitch?

Why can’t I conceive that maybe, just maybe, I am worthy?

Questions asked so many times
As before, unanswered.
And the beast triumphs.

I am reminded today of how much our society relies on computers; and how that may not be the best thing.

I came in to work this morning, turned on my computer, and sat down to get the day started. I first called down the hall to schedule an appointment so I wouldn’t forget. “I’d be happy to. Can you call back in a few minutes, though? The computer is down.” Ah. The scheduling program is often down, and if they didn’t finish the close yesterday, they can’t access the program until it’s finished. No problem.

Then I see the little window at the bottom of my screen. “Computer offline. You cannot access the [server] drive.” Well, crap on toast. All my files are saved on the server so I can access them anywhere, because I often fill in for others at their desk and want to still be able to do my own work as well.

Ok, fine. I know IT has been working very hard on this issue, staying late all week, and I really feel for them and appreciate what they do. I’ll go online, check my email and stuff, and hope that the server’s back up by the time I get done. Oh yeah, the entire network is down (thus no access to the scheduling software, or the server) so I can’t go online. And I can’t have my co-worker, who for some reason is having no problem accessing the server or the email server, send me a file or two to work on because I cannot access the email server either. So I am currently staring at a lump of non-biodegradable plastic and wires that is glaring back at me, laughing at my frustration because I can’t get any work done. No, really, I’m wracking my brain to find something to do that doesn’t require a computer. Yeah, nada.

So I can access Word. I can type a rant to post sometime later, probably when I get home to my computer that only gives me trouble occasionally. At least at home, my IT staff is more receptive to my needs and can address issues immediately, usually because they are preventing him from going online as well. Then again, I believe he said he was working late today…

I think I should have stayed in bed this morning.

First: we saw it in Imax 3D. Kick ass! Really, totally awesome. And did I mention the Tron trailer? Drools!!

So to the movie itself. I really loved it. I thought it was a great story line, acted very well, and there were several parts that instigated a few chuckles. Was it full of deep insight into society and it’s ills? no. Did it demonstrate to the viewer the struggles of humanity overcoming its limitations? no. Was it fun? hells yeah! Was Johnny Depp fun, quirky and crazy? I repeat: Hells yeah. And did I mention Alan Rickman?

So, I want a Cheshire cat. And a Bandersnatch, now that I know (remember?) what one is. Yes, I did see the Disney cartoon released umpteen (59) years ago, though not when originally released (*Wink*). And I think I read the book. I guess I just forgot the Bandersnatch. Sorry

And I might want a Jabberwocky too. I’ll get back to you on that.

Depp’s accent and demeanor were incredible. I lost his words sometimes, but I think that was part of the character. Mia Wasikowska was the perfect ingenue/rebel/lost and confused not quite little girl turned hero. Anne Hathaway was actually kinda scary as the white queen. Dare I say scarier than the “evil” red queen?

Our only negative critiques: While Depp’s character was fun and performed well, it was too close to Jack Sparrow. And Willie Wonka now that I think about it. There were times that you could not distinguish the characters and, while Depp is great in these roles, I don’t think they demonstrate his range as an actor.

Also, the ending left something out. I walked out of the theater with an overall good feeling, but felt that the last piece didn’t fall into place. As a matter of fact, the last few minutes seemed kinda rushed. And I can’t really say more without spoiling it, so send me a message if you want to know exactly what I’m talking about. Let’s just leave it at I was waiting for one more thing that just didn’t appear. Which, for those of you who saw it, “Alice” from the SyFy channel delivered.

The Official Disney Site

IMDB

On the way to Tulum

One of our guides talking about the ruins

one of the signs explaining Mayan history & culture.

Yes, the iguana's were pretty big.

The scenery was incredible, with the beautiful blue sea behind us.

The rest of the Tulum pictures, and a little Playa del Carmen & Cozumel

Day 6: The last day we spent at sea, getting back to good old Port Canaveral. The day was relaxing. We slept a lot and hung out in the hot tub one more time. All –in-all, we had a wonderful time

Our Titanic moment at the very front of the ship. We kept missing the dolphins!

Me holding a turtle

Attack turtle

So we got to the bus on time….but no one else did! We had to wait 30 minutes for everyone else to get back. So that started us off late. Then we went to the rum cake factory…which was actually just this average-sized tourist trap. Ok, fine, I wanted to get a bunch of rum cakes anyway. Except for one small problem. In addition to the 30-40 people on our bus, there were about three other tours that stopped there at the same time! You couldn’t move, let along shop! That’s ok….we waited for everyone else AGAIN but we’ll have plenty of time after the tour to go shopping for rum cakes closer to the dock. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

On to the next stop, Hell, Grand Cayman.

And this is Hell, Grand Cayman

So then we arrive at the dock for our boat out to Stingray City. Oh yeah, it’ll be here in 10 minutes. And it’s not big enough for all of us. And the next one has a bad engine…By this time we are all a little nervous about our ship leaving without us. No, seriously! But we are assured that the company has a contract with the ship to 1. Give us our full excursion and 2. Get us on the ship. And they did. We were the 2nd to last tender….about 15 minutes after the cruise line told us the last tender would leave. Ah well, they didn’t leave us there!

The stingrays were pretty cool. It was basically a shallow sandbar, about 3-4 feet deep, and the wild stingrays hang out there because the tourists feed them. Yep, we fed them. Or at least Keith did. I stayed in the water for, oh, about 15 minutes…until about 5 stingrays the size of a patio umbrella (open people, not closed) all came up to me at once. They passed right up against my legs.

My legs...being harassed by stingrays

Keith petting Frisbee

But Keith stayed in. He got to feed a few, too. Here’s a decent video of him feeding the stingrays.

We decided, next time, to stick with one or two spots instead of four!

Here are the rest of the pictures of Jamaica.

Looking out from the top of a mountain in Ocho Rios, Jamaica

So the first stop was the gardens, which were nice. Very well taken care of and the tour guide was pretty cool. A lot of the plants were stuff we have here in Florida, but the Banyan trees were really neat!

A Banyan tree. They use these to make wicker, among other things

Dunn’s River Falls was not what I expected. I thought you just walked up stairs and stuff along the falls. Checking out the scenery along the way. HELL NO! You literally walk up the falls!

They also insisted we get as wet as possible!

Obviously Keith finished the climb.

He Can do it, He's SuperKeith

See, I made it to the top...using the stairs :-)

Here are the rest of the pcitures from Jamaica.

Day 2: Labadee, Haiti: As this is a private island, we didn’t find too much to do that looked all that interesting to us, so we decided to make that our snorkeling day. OMG!

Picture of the coral reef

Keith Snorkeling

Here I am snorkeling!

Then we walked around the island and stuff. It was really pretty awesome! They had a bunch of land hermit crabs, like everywhere.

Hatian hermit crab

Oh yeah, and avoid the island’s straw market. No, really! They were terrible! I only went because I was collecting coins as my souvenir and I needed a Haitian coin. I think I would have been better off going to the bank in Grand Cayman and asking for Haitian money!

then we had a yummy lunch and relaxed.

Here are the rest of the pictures.

We went on a 7 day Eastern Caribbean cruise on the Freedom of the Seas, visiting the cruise line’s (Royal Caribbean) private island in Haiti (Labadee); Ocho Rios, Jamaica; Grand Cayman; and Cozumel, Mexico. So here’s the break down:

Day 1: The first day we spent on the ship exploring as we headed to Haiti. And by the way, it was awesome! We got a free upgrade from the smallest, lowest cabin to one with a window overlooking the Royal Promenade. At first, I was worried about the noise and lights, but the room was soundproof (or at least I hope it was) and the curtains shut out all light (when I remembered to close them… ) Our cabin was right over the pizza shop, poor Keith.

Here I am, looking out our window.

Keith's playing minigolf with a storm in the background

We also found out that there was a mini movie theater on the ship. I finally got to see Dark Knight. Kinda disappointing, actually. There were really great shows, including the ice skating show, and the food was awesome! Well, the pizza was ok…

And did I mention the hot tub? OMG! IT was soooo cool. For all my friends afraid of heights, ignore this picture…

The view from the hot tub, looking down!

Towel animals are great!

Side note: Before we left on Sunday, we got to see the local sea turtle. One of the crew members said he always comes out to see the ship off. Then, about an hour later, we were still standing on the deck watching the water pass and we saw another one! He went under real fast and We didn’t get a picture, but he was sooo cute!

Sea turtle saying goodbye

and go here if you want to see the rest of the pictures of us on the ship!

Christmas is my favorite time of year. I love the decorations, the anticipation, the smells of pine and winter (well, not quite here in Florida, but sometimes), the cooking, the time off work, the excruciating struggle to find something for everyone on your list even though you have no idea what they have and/or want and making that stomach clenching decision to purchase something and spending Christmas morning eagerly watching their faces for that spark of eagerness or dread and trying to avoid their eyes as you open gift after stupid gift that’s just going to sit on your shelf or is two sizes too big (or small) and trying to pretend that you really love it. Or even better, opening the card with the $10 gift certificate as they open the card from you with the $25 check…

I have come to the point in my life where I realize that Christmas isn’t about sweating over what gifts to get loved ones and practicing pleased surprised faces in the mirror. I’m at that place where I have what I need and can afford to get what I want, or have learned to wait until I can. I know I don’t want more knick knacks or gift certificates; I want to spend quality time with my family, appreciating who and what they are and not stressing about what they think about some silly gift or what they wasted money on for me, often money they really don’t have.

And I’ve told them this, many times.

But my family seems to be stuck into this evil spiral that love means buying stuff, or at least that’s the best way to show they love me. Or maybe it’s the rush of seeing someone’s face as they open that gorgeous gift. You know, the look I have been practicing for several years and almost have perfected. Either way, they don’t listen. They insist on purchasing silly little trinkets that I’m going to absolutely love (“Of course I do, Mom! I know exactly where I’m going to put it!” for the next 5 years until I think I can get away with packing it up and taking it to Goodwill) because they got it on sale or found it at some thrift shop (“Oh, so this lingerie was used? Thanks, it’s perfect!”). And no amount of pleading will stop them (“But I got a really good deal on it”).

Well this year I am putting my foot down. I mean it. And here’s the part for the family: Keith and I will NOT be accepting Christmas gifts this year. Any gift purchased will be returned or, if a thrift store special, will be donated to the local thrift store. And we will not be purchasing gifts for anyone either. No gift certificates or checks, with the exception of our nephew who is 5 and is entitled to and appreciates Christmas presents.

Save the money for gifts for your grandchildren (or, as the case may be, your son), or for something for yourself.

And if you feel as though you must get us something, then here are links to the charities Keith and I support. Make a donation to them in our name. We will accept the certificate they send. Any monies received from returned gifts will be going to one of the said charities, so please save us the trip to Wal-mart or the mall. Thank you.

Save the Manatees (I wear a Medium t-shirt)
Worldwide Wildlife Foundation: donate (maximize) or adopt (snow leopard or wolf)
American Red Cross
SPCA
Save the Hooters
Save the Whohas, Hooters, and Weewees
Save the Puppies

Instead of gift exchanges, we just want to spend some time with you. Preferably time with the TV off. We’ll go to dinner, or I’ll cook, whichever. Life’s too short to waste time in over-crowded stores fighting with the insane monsters people become at Christmas sweating over a gift the recipient’s not going to want or need anyway. Life should be spent enjoying the company of those you love.

PS: This, of course, does not apply to birthdays. Mine just happens to be 2 weeks after Christmas, but who’s counting?

Hey, maybe the aliens from Hulu are on the wrong track. They should make people input random letters and numbers while pointing and clicking in a million different places if they really want people’s brains to rot. They could make it a password set up or something, and make us change our passwords every 30 days so we have to do it all again. Wait, it gets better! They can give us actual data from some company and have us do the data entry for the company that’s paying them for the service, rotting our brain and getting paid in human money at the same time!! Mwahahahah.

So the deceptive part of data entry: here you are typing (point, click) away and slowly losing focus on the world around you. In defense, your brain tries to kick in to another subject, like blogging and all that, and all of a sudden you are making mistakes and your fingers (point, click) don’t want to input what you are telling them to! It’s an evil, mutant mess! And boring as hell!! I do not envy those people who do this for a living.

Media quote for the day: “They’re here!”-The Poltergeist